Fist of Legend

Like in many sports, I always wished I could go back in time. And grab teams and athletes of the past and see how they do in the present. Imagine Babe Ruth playing with today's Yankees, or Jim brown playing with today's Cleveland Browns, or even(as discussed before) Bird's Celtics vs KG's Celtics. To keep things simpler, how about boxing greats like Ali, Frasier, Tyson, Graziano, and of course Joe Louis. I know this is a recurring theme but, I would really like to see these fighters in their prime take each other on. These were the guys that made boxing such a great sport. I used to love watching these PPV matches. Now, i'd rather screw a wooden box filled with broken glass and lemon juice. Just imagine how much money people would put down to watch a Tyson/Ali, Graziano/Frasier macthup. I'm talking at LEAST $1000/PPV. These are prime fights. Not the ones we see now with no names and european hacks trash talking like its the WWE. These guys actually had a storyline in their background. Graziano was a criminal trying to use boxing as a way to make money. Ali was a model Muslim who refused the Vietnam Draft. Tyson was regarded as one of the best of all times and the youngest to be crowned champion.

With UFC becoming the mainstream sport of fighters and boxing becoming obsolete, it'd be great to have a time machine.

the Capt.

"You know how I be"

What happened to this happy couple? Aside from Kobe dropping dime on Shaq's philanthropic use of his poppycock, and the back and forth remarks about one another, and the fact that Shaq refers to Kobe as "You know who" and Phil Jackson as "Benedict Arnold", and the fact that Kobe's inability to stay faithful(as seen above) to his pornstar like wife(also his high school sweetheart) by banging HOTEL MAIDS, shouldn't be enough reasons for the two to not get along. Shaq did wrote a song for Kobe.....actually, about Kobe. The song, titled "Kobe, tell me how my a** tastes" is an ode to times when things were friendlier between the two. When Shaq says "You know how I be, last week Kobe couldn't do without me." he's trying to tell us how lonely Kobe has been without his big brother by his side. Almost to say that "without" Shaq, Kobe just couldn't play up to his potential without his wingman to kep his spirits up high. I mean, an artist like Shaq who has accrued six albums, two platinum, two gold(and is very humble about his accolades) would never be serious when he says "I'm a horse, Kobe ratted me out, that's why I'm getting divorced". Its obvious that Shaq is a human and in no way is implying that he has the dong of a "horse". I mean, everyone knows scientifically thats inaccurate(1ft of height=1inch on length....unless of course you only have 2 letters in your first name.........its science). The world also knows that there are a million Shaqs and only one Shaquille, hence "He said Shaq gave a B****a mil, I don't do that cause my names Shaquille". I know alot of Shaqs and very few Shaquilles. Why would Shaquille give any "B****" a million dollars? He can't afford that in the first place. Nobody is that rich, am I right? The same man that "I love 'em, I don't leave 'em. I got a vasectomy, now I can't breed 'em." has made huge sacrifices. To get a vasectomy is one of the most generous ways to show a woman how much you mean to her. Because doctors have shown that procedures like that are irreversible. All in all, I don't think Shaq meant any of the lyrics that he so dashingly displayed on stage about Kobe and his inability to win a championship without him. Shaq is in the position now where he could talk smack if he wanted to. His Suns played great this year with Shaq playing for a full "injury free" season. I'm sure while Kobe's Lakers continued into the playoffs, Shaq was cheering on his former team all the way to Game 6 of the Finals while sitting on his couch at home. I do say "Kobe's Lakers" because at one time it was, according to Shaq, his team. Shaq had so much sway on that team, he even said Kobe would be a free agent by season's end. Shaq even gave Kobe the option of leaving the team if he didn't like the way he ran it.

I just think nothing was meant by the freestyling of Shaq and that he is no longer bitter about the feud or about Kobe telling the world about Shaq cheating. Shaquille phrased it perfectly when he asked his one time friend "Kobe, tell me how my ass tastes."

The Capt.

Championships

Are the Pats done? As they have aged over the years. They have only gotten better at the wide out position and at running back. There offensive line showed wear and tear in the SB. Terrific Tom was lets say still terrific. I am worried.....

Cinco

Sox recruit from a galaxy far, far, away....

After losing Curt Schilling to surgery, the Boston Red Sox resort to traveling to the Wookie planet of Kashyyyk in order to fill the void. Just 12 parsecs from Earth, this Mid Rim planet is the principal world of the Kashyyyk system. This star system that also contains the homeworld of the reptilian Trandoshans, which has been a heavy recruiting planet since the drafting of Derek Jeter back in 1992. The Sox chose the wookies for their fierce throwing arms, short tempered attitude, and their defiance to all things Empire. After a few scouting trips to several villages, Theo Epstein spotted the famed Wookie warrior Chewbacca throwing 200lbs spears at Banthas from a distance of 300ft. That was all Theo needed to see to sign the 7'6'', 425lbs left to a 30yr $65million deal. When asked as to why he chose a 30yr deal instead of a 3yr deal Theo replied "Well. The average lifespan of a wookie in human years is 347yrs. Give a take a rebellion here or there". When asked how he feels about playing for the famed Boston Red Sox Chewie stated "Rrrooowwrr. Ggggrggggyylll. Hhrrggrrllllerrrr!!!". "You said it Chewie" commented agent Han Solo. When reporters asked about the incedent in which the wookie once pulled the throwing arm off of Charleston River Dogs' Chance Baker during an inter-galactic exhibition, the wookie just chuckled.

"Laugh it up fuzzball"

Capt.

The Banwagon Fans....

In my opinion these people are giving us "hardcore" Sox fans a bad name. Now when people see you wearing a Sox hat you get that "of course you’re a Sox fan" look. Recently the "4 letter website/network" had a story about which teams had the most bandwagon fans. Research showed that the Sox had the most bandwagoners. I was disgusted. I was disgusted because I actually think it's true! Here's a classic example....true story. I'm not sure of the date. I want to say it was Thursday October 21, 2004. The night before the Sox had just beaten the NYY in game 7 after being down 0-3 in the series. I was at work, in the men’s room washing my hands when a fellow co-worker walked in. Here's our conversation:

Loser: How 'bout 'dem Sox huh?

Me: I know huh? We finally get a chance at the WS. I hope the Sox can come through and finally exercise some demons.

Loser: Oh I don't even care about the WS. All I cared about was beating those F'ing NYY. I hate them more than anything.

Me: How could you not care about the WS?? This is what it’s all about. Don't you want those "1918" chants to go away? If we don't win the WS, the win against the Yanks means nothing.

Loser: Nah. As long as we beat the Yanks, I'm good.

Now at this point, I'm fuming. You guys ever see that Jim Carrey movie "Cable Guy"? That scene in the bathroom where he's beating up Cary Elwes? Well let me just say........that did not happen here. I wanted to though.
Anyways, that’s a clear definition of a bandwagon fan. To this day, whenever I see that guy at work wearing his Sox paraphernalia I think of the conversation we had on October 21, 2004...and then I throw-up in my mouth a bit.

Shill the Pill

Lets face it.... The Sox got all they needed out of Curt Shilling. He resigned a pretty lucrative deal probably knowing he would never be the same again. The man needs to hang it up and let the city of Boston continue to dominate and bring up studs like Clay, Lester, Masterson and others. Shilling is all about Shilling. He dosnt fit the mold of the Sox anymore. Theo needs to step in here and release him. Unless of course he is willing to go to the bull pen. Anyway I was not a big fan when he first came to Titletown and I an still not today. Shill thanks for what you gave us but retire your all washed up.

Schilling....

I guess all good things have to come to an end. Curt Schilling announced today that he will need season ending surgery on his arm. He also indicated that his career may be over. I'll never forget when the Sox signed him on thanksgiving '03. I was crazy excited. All I could think about was having Pedro & Schill 1-2 in the rotation. No other team could claim they had two aces in their starting rotation. His ’04 season in the bean was great. He won 21 games and finished 2nd in the CY Young vote. We all know what he did in the playoffs that year. The question now is if he is done, is Curt Schilling a Hall of Famer? My personal feeling is that I think he will get in. Not on the first ballot, but definitely eventually he will. He was a great big game pitcher. What he did in the post season through out his career should be enough to get him in the hall. I have to admit I wasn’t always the biggest Schilling fan. If he played for any other team, I would probably hate him. He has an opinion on everything…even if you’re not asking for it. He also can be very arrogant. The Schilling on the field you have to respect however. So, if this is the end Mr. Schilling, I want to thank you for helping all us Sox fans get that monkey off our backs in ’04. The #38 jersey probably won’t be worn again for awhile. Not sure if it will get retired, but it will definitely be out of commission for awhile like: Rice’s #14, Nomar’s #5, Pedro’s #45 (which by the way will most certainly get retired, but that’s another blog for another day).

Haters....

"If they hate then let 'em hate and watch the money pile up" In a NE sports fan case its probably more like "watch the championships pile up". I mean good god. The Sox are the defending champs, and the best team this season. The Pats went to the SB (i know, i know) after finishing the regular season undefeated. The Celts just beat the Lakers in the Finals. Its never been like this around here. The haters, of course, will always be there. They claim there were no Sox fans before 2004. No Pats fans before 2001. No C's fans after the Bird era. People are just jealous in my opinion. Honestly, I don't blame them for hating. New England is the center of the sports world..maybe even the universe.